Bedtime Thoughts · Happiness · Positivity · Self Improvement

Look back and remember who you wanted to be

Every day I pass by the same homeless man that walks around with a cart full of all his possessions on my way home from work. Every day I see him in the exact same spots, sometimes sitting at a bus stop resting his head on his belongings, other times walking up and down the neighboring streets. And it got me thinking – when he was baby, a toddler, a kid, when he had less worries, more hope, when he played to his heart’s content, before particular incidents weighed him down, did he envision his life to be the way it is now? I imagine not.

All of us were carefree kids at some point of time. Without a serious thought in the world, innocent, pure and honest, we would play unbothered by other events. Yet, overtime, the purity got tarnished through a few decisions and experiences. Through an erratic upbringing, through associating with bad influences, through making poor decisions or through experiencing incidents out of our control, we ended up in a place we never imagined.

Think about it – does anyone think their future wouldn’t be great when they were little? Does anyone imagine that when they grow up they will be a druggy, a convict, homeless? As a kid, we are filled with hopes and dreams, aspirations of all sorts. Yet, somewhere down the line, when we needed to be nurtured, when we needed to turn right instead of left, when we needed someone for comfort, we, instead, took a crucial turn for the worse. It’s chilling to see the lives of some of these people who, I can only imagine, didn’t envision their life to be that particular way.

The homeless man with a cart full of all his belongings that I see each and every day sure as hell didn’t imagine his life to be that way. The boy whom I went to middle school with who was quiet, kind and intelligent but faced family problems surely didn’t imagine his life to be full of drugs and poverty. The convicts I watched a documentary on didn’t imagine their life to be that way. The girl whose energy electrified the room but now has lost that same spirit and zest for life certainly didn’t imagine her life to be that way. And the list goes on and on. And to witness some of the situations first hand, to observe the hopes slowly crumbling away and the innocent eyes becoming dim is disheartening, to say the least.

And frankly, this does not apply to only felons, criminals or druggies. This applies to all of us. The life that we are living now – is this the life we imagined? Are we living up to our utmost potential? Are we fulfilling our inner-child’s hopes and desires? And, are we the person who we dreamed to be?

When you were little, without real worries, playing handball or cricket with your friends after school, running around before curfew, finishing homework before bed, did you imagine your life to be the way it is now?

And now, as you look back, are you living up to your inner-child’s expectations? Take a look at yourself and really reflect. It is easy to get lost in the motion and the commotion of things and it is particularly easy to get stuck in a rut, but it is imperative that you make time for yourself and question your words, your actions and your mindset. Why do I behave this way? What is causing me to do so? Am I living up to my potential and am I content? And what can I do to make myself content that is in my control? Asking these meaningful questions allow us to grow. They allow us to be that person who we imagined ourselves to be. They allow us to question our choices and they guide us towards the direction we strived to go towards.

If someone told you to speak about yourself in true form with no fabrication, would you be able to talk with full confidence and pride in front of those who mean the most to you? Would you be able to confidently say that you are the best that you can be? Or would you disappoint that once hopeful child?

Look back and remember who you wanted to be


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